Emily is Seventeen

Our funny, brave, smart, strong will, athletic Emily is seventeen today.  She's a loyal friend, a lover of animals, a math whiz, an avid shopper, and an adventurous eater.  We are so proud of her each and every day.

Eighteen

It's a little hard to believe...

Sixteen

Our beautiful Emily turns sixteen today.  She is such an incredible human and it is such a privilege to watch her grow as a person every day.  Emily loves her friends and has more than we can count.  She loves to play sports and excels in every sport and in any position she is asked to play.  She works incredibly hard in school and has the grades to prove it.  Time and time again, we are blown away by her report cards, her success on the field, her dedication to her craft (whether it be singing, hours in the yard playing soccer or lacrosse, or repeats the track), and her incredible friendships. We are so proud of the person she is today, as well as the fact that she continues to grow into an even more amazing person every day.  Happy birthday baby girl!!!

Seventeen

 Elizabeth made it through another year and is finally seventeen!  She had a challenging year with COVID and academics, but we are so proud of how she persevered.  She continues to carry a challenging course load at school, including three AP classes during her junior year.  The workload was heavy, but she was up to the task, having her best academic year yet, grade-wise.  She lettered in three sports, captain of two, and excelled in lacrosse during the spring. Her lacrosse game has really exploded over the summer and she's been in contact with a few college coaches about playing, including a campus visit and tour last week.  We don't know where this road will take her, but it will be an exciting journey no matter what she decides.  She went to two proms (after thinking that COVID would rob her of the opportunity to ever attend a prom) and had a fantastic time at both of them.  She got her license and suddenly, she seems to be driving everywhere.  We are enjoying watching her expand her horizons and we can't wait to see what the next year brings, including high school graduation and college decisions!  Happy birthday to our first born.

Fifteen

Our sweet, funny, stubborn, athletic, beautiful Emily is fifteen today and what a year she's had.  She started her year as an 8th grader and ended it on the eve of final exams as a freshman.  She has embraced absolutely everything about high school - from her hard won position as a starter on the varsity soccer team (a dream come true), to her ever-increasing circle of friends, to the rigor of her academic courses - Emily has absolutely thrived.  She has also dealt with the constant changes and disappointments of COVID better than almost anyone we know.  When sports were "paused" over the winter, she hit the gym with a vengeance and came back in the spring stronger and faster, and with a killer throw in.  When her lacrosse team was quarantined and she had to take classes online, she made the best of it, cooking breakfasts and lunches for herself, such that her teachers always wanted details about what she was making.  We have watched her blossom as a person as her friend group grows - she is well-liked by school friends and her soccer friends and they are all always looking for ways to spend as much time together as possible.  She is fun and easy to be around 95% of the time, although she's an absolute terror the other 5%. We have enjoyed watching her grow this year and cannot wait to see what the future holds for her.

Sixteen

Sixteen.  Today is pretty much the biggest milestone we've known in our family and Elizabeth has been pretty much counting down the days.  She's done so much in these last 16 years, I don't even know where to begin.  We are so incredibly proud of her resilient spirit; her incredible pursuit of knowledge; her love of sports; her ever deepening and growing friendships with some amazing people; her love of family; her sense of humor; her (sometimes surprising) kindness; and her unbreakable spirit.  We are looking forward to seeing what her last two years of high school bring, as she embarks on some of her most difficult courses and her college search begins.  Happy birthday to our incredible first born.

Fourteen

Emily is fourteen today and she couldn't be happier about it.  Despite the fact that these last few months have not gone as planned, she has never missed a beat.  I can only remember one time since the world stopped moving that she was anything but happy - and it was because she couldn't master a certain number of juggles with the soccer ball.  She continues to be happiest when she is surrounded by her four best friends - none of whom she goes to school with but all of whom she would spend 24/7 with if she had the chance.  She loves being with her soccer team and with her friends from school and pretty much gets along with everyone.  She continues to excel at school, especially math and science.  In three years of middle school, she received only one A- and ended up with more A+ grades than A's.  She still loves to read but over the last several months, I've noticed that she really just loves to learn new things.  I've stumbled upon her listening to podcasts about a variety of topics while doing school work or cleaning up her work area.  Emily is an incredibly hard worker.  We were so impressed with how seriously she took her work during remote schooling; we were even more impressed with her dedication to soccer.  With the exception of only Easter Sunday, she has gone running, worked out or spent time working on soccer skills every single day.  We hope that her commitment to soccer pays off for her when the kids are finally allowed to return to the fields.  Emily is sooooo nervous, but sooooo excited about high school.  We can't wait to see what amazing things she does when she spreads her wings and flies.  Happy fourteenth birthday Emily - we hope that this year is as amazing as you are!

Fifteen

Elizabeth is fifteen today!  She has kept us on our toes since day one and I think that she just might for the rest of her life!  She works extremely hard at school - not only with her academics, but with her music and her athletics.  She is a loyal friend who has deep friendships with a few people and will not suffer the foolishness of others.  You always know where you stand with her.  We are so proud of the young woman she is becoming - strong, loyal, athletic, intelligent and witty.  We love you so much Elizabeth - have a wonderful birthday!!

Thirteen

Today, our baby is a teenager. What a year she's had.  She grew like a weed, getting stronger and faster with each passing week.  She continues to love playing soccer, sometimes as much as seven days a week.  This year, she's put in an impressive amount of work off the field - running, lifting and doing what she needs to do to get better all the time.  She fell in love with basketball over the winter and is liking lacrosse more and more every time she steps on the field.  We are proud of her work ethic in the classroom - two weeks at Choate over the summer, a trip to the state invention convention, high honors and an aptitude for math (not sure where that comes from).  Her best friends, not surprisingly, are the girls who live and breathe soccer just like she does - in particular, her car pool crew, the girls that run with her all summer.  She's looking forward to a summer of fun and one more year of middle school - but she's already looking down the road to high school.  Happy birthday to our silly, funny, sporty, smart, beautiful Emily.  We can't wait to see what you do this year!

Fourteen

Elizabeth is fourteen today and what a year she's had.  Over the last twelve months, she's experienced great disappointments, tremendous sadness, jubilation and pride, and learned to find the silver lining in every cloud.  We could not be more proud of her hard work - in school and on the playing field - and her dedication to everything she does.  She is a wonderful flute player; a tenacious lacrosse player; an enthusiastic basketball player; and a reluctantly good runner.  We are continually impressed by her academic success and pray that it continues in high school, as she has selected the most difficult classes available to a freshman.  We know that she will give it her all, as that is the only way she knows how to live her life.  Happy fourteenth birthday to our Elizabeth.  We are so happy that to be on this wild ride with you.

Twelve

It's a cliche, but we blinked and Emily turned twelve.  She's had a terrific year - of school, sports and friends.  Her transition to the rigor of middle school was seamless and she has really enjoyed all of her teachers and everything she's learned this year.  She had a great year of sports - a great cross country season, a surprising basketball season and a fun spring lacrosse season.  Soccer remains her primary focus and she's happily played in eight soccer tournaments since her last birthday.  She loves all of her friends, especially her soccer carpool besties!  Most importantly, her goofball personality has flourished - she laughs all the time and loves to tell awful jokes; her one liners and facial expressions keep us all in stitches.
Happy birthday to our sweet Emily!  We are so happy to be on this wonderful ride with you!

A Life Well Lived

Last week, we lost my mom.  After a three year battle with Alzheimer's, my mother's journey on earth ended and she peacefully went to heaven.  My mom lived an amazing life and as kids, we've always said that she lived the American Dream.  She was born during the Great Depression and was incredibly poor as a child.  She met and married my dad in the late 1950's and theirs was a great love affair.  Even when we were kids, we always understood how much they loved each other.  They worked hard and for their 25th wedding anniversary, took their first big vacation.  After that, they visited five continents and close to 20 countries.  Until Alzheimer's began to steal her from us, she loved to sing, bake and spend time with her children and grandchildren.  Click here for the link to the video we prepared for our parents' 50th wedding anniversary, more than 8 years ago.

Below is the text from the eulogy I wrote and delivered at her funeral:

Good morning. Thank you all for being here today to celebrate my mother.

Mom was born in 1936, in the heart of the Great Depression, and she had a difficult childhood. Her parents separated when she was a little girl, and my grandmother struggled to raise 2 young girls alone. At times, food and clothing were scarce and Mom began working at a very young age to help support the family. 

After graduating from St. Joseph High School for Girls in 1954, she took a job at the Telephone Company. In 1958, she met my father and as he tells the story, by the second date, he knew she was The One. They were married less than a year later. My parents’ honeymoon included a Giants/Steelers game and then Niagara Falls. I’m sure my mother thought that she had taken the trip of a lifetime – little did she know how things would turn out.

Mom and Dad settled in on Candia Road – buying the house next door to this church where my father still lives today – more than 57 years ago. Together, they raised the four of us – Michael, Kathleen, Joe and me. We all have memories of sharing a hot breakfast together every morning, taking homemade lunches to school every day and sharing family meals together every night. If one of us missed regular dinner time because of work or sports, mom always had a warm plate waiting when we got home and she would sit and keep us company while we ate.

Mom was a wonderful baker. Her bread and rolls won blue ribbons for years at the Deerfield Fair. Her baklava was famous; her fudge delicious; her blueberry pie considered second to none by family and friends; and her chocolate cookies were so good that my college friends affectionately called her “Mrs. O’Chip” instead of Mrs. O’Connor.

Mom and Dad had a great marriage. As kids, I’m certain that we didn’t fully understand their partnership but it had an impact on us. Their love left an impression, as they modeled for us what a good marriage should be like. The greatest evidence of their influence is that the four of us all chose such good partners when we got married. What a gift they gave us.

After many years of hard work, saving money and raising a family, mom and dad began taking trips together. Other people take vacations. My parents took trips.  

Two weeks in coastal California; two weeks in the southwest touring national parks; two weeks in Hawaii (twice); and three weeks in Alaska. And then, the real traveling began. A month in Japan and China; a month in Australia and New Zealand; weeks traveling through many countries in Africa; Ireland; the Canadian Rockies; Turkey; Greece; Israel; Germany; Poland; Italy; and years later, one final trip, to South Africa. In all, they traveled more than 200,000 miles together.  

And mom didn’t just visit these places – she EXPERIENCED them. She walked the Great Wall of China; fed a koala bear in Australia; pet a cheetah in South Africa; visited a former concentration camp in Poland; toured mosques and synagogues in Istanbul and Jerusalem; watched a pride of lions kill its prey on safari in South Africa; watched the sun rise from a hot air balloon over the plains of Tanzania; and walked ancient ruins in Athens. Thinking about her childhood, never could my mom have imagined all the places she would go and all of the things she would see and do. Truly, she lived the American Dream.  

In her final years, my mother suffered from Alzheimer’s. Although it is important to remember how she lived, not how she died, I would be remiss if I did not mention the toll that this disease took on not only my mother, but also my father and each of her children. We were, however, incredibly lucky. My sister Kathleen was with my mother every step of the way as she battled this disease and for that, and so many other things, we owe her a debt of gratitude. May you all be so lucky to have a Kathleen in your family. 

Ralph Waldo Emerson said “it is not the length of life, but the depth.” Mom lived fully and deeply. She loved each of us fully and deeply. She taught us how to love and how to live. We are forever grateful for her legacy and we will always carry her in our hearts.

Thirteen

Elizabeth turned thirteen today.  I know that I say this every year, but I just can't believe it - where does the time go?  It seems impossible to believe that she is entering yet another phase of her life, the teenage years.  Elizabeth is both incredibly sensitive and tough as nails.  She impresses us with her maturity and her ability to weather any storm - not that she is impervious to pain, but that she comes through conflicts bruised and battered, but stronger than than before.  Elizabeth continues to excel academically, thanks to God's gifts and an incredible work ethic.  Her love for reading knows no bounds and while math continues to be her Achille's Heel, she's made tremendous progress over the last year.  She buckled down and really committed herself to her sports over this year, taking her lacrosse game to a whole new level, leading her cross country team at every race and becoming a dependable and reliable member of her basketball team.  She loves animals and wants to save every animal she lays eyes on, regardless of species.  Despite the fact that she drives us crazy and challenges our parenting abilities (and our patience) at every turn, Lee and I could not be more proud of the person she is and the person she is working to become.  Happy birthday to our teenager.  We love you so much!

P.S.  You know you have a teenager when they pick a song by Pitbull for their birthday video....

Eleven

Our baby girl turns eleven today.  She had a pretty rough day, as she's been under the weather for several days and although she gave it her best, she spent a few hours napping after two brutal soccer games.  Going through all of the photos to make her video reminded me of so many great moments that she had this year - she had some really great moments in soccer and made amazing memories with her various teams; she tried a new sport; performed in All State band for the first time; and if possible, became a more voracious reader.  Emily is a complete goof ball, but she is serious (as a heart attack) about school and sports.  She's super competitive and when she sets her mind to something, there's no stopping her.  She still surprises us, from time to time, with her lack of confidence, but we are working on that.  Emily continues to love Jesus and we are impressed with her kindness and her devotion to her daily bible reading.  Lee and I are so blessed to have Emily as our daughter and we can't wait to see what this year brings!  Her lucky number is 11 and we believe that God has great things in store for her this year.  Happy Birthday!!!

Twelve

Today is Elizabeth's twelfth birthday and what a year she's had.  Her first year in middle school, and she learned to shoulder the responsibility of multiple teachers, a heavy homework load and many extra curricular activities.  She tried two new sports - cross country and basketball - and learned a lot in both.  She made new friends and strengthened bonds with some of her old friends.  She got serious about school and made High Honors (straight A's) all three trimesters of school.  Elizabeth stepped far outside of her comfort zone and participated in both Regional Honors Band and All State Concert Band - trying out for both and working very hard to practice the difficult music.  She also went away for the first time - attending a two week academic summer program at Choate Rosemary Hall and loving every second of it.  She made a ton of friends, many of whom told me when I met them, that she was such a good person.  Elizabeth is loyal and values loyalty in return.  She is stubborn beyond belief and can be incredibly difficult.  But mostly, she is a kind, generous and thoughtful person and we are so glad that she is our daughter.

Emily is Ten - Video

It's a week late and some of the photos are not perfect, but here is Emily's birthday video!

2015: Year in Review

When the holidays are over and the reality of winter starts setting in, there is nothing better than looking back on the year.  I love making these videos and getting a reminder of all of the many blessings in our lives.

19th Annual Power Challenge: Boston

Team Refuge put on a show at the 19th Annual Power Challenge in Boston:

Eleven

Elizabeth turns eleven today and as I look back over the last year, I really marvel at the young lady she is becoming.  She continues to excel at school - this year, she began to learn that brains alone are not enough, but that she also needed to work hard - and she did, making both of us proud of how much she accomplished.  She did not like her teacher this year, but pushed through it and continued to do well, regardless of the fact that she felt that there were such low expectations of her.  But now - middle school is on the horizon and she couldn't be more eager.  She continues to be a prolific reader, devouring every book I can find for her.  She has already read more than 150 books this year and there are stacks of books in our house, just waiting for her.  Elizabeth continues to do very well with the flute, making the All State Gala Band this year and always working harder and harder to become a better musician.  She also loves to sing, although a touch of stage fright may prevent her from fully developing that talent - only time will tell.  She had some disappointment on the soccer field, but is starting to come into her own with lacrosse and is willing to try new sports, instead of continuing to be unhappy doing the same old thing.  Elizabeth is extremely sensitive and prone to moodiness, which can make things in our house bit difficult at times - this is something we've seen since toddlerhood, but as she grows, it is harder to manage from a parental perspective.  Despite her fragile feelings, however, she is very strong willed and stubborn.  She is a true and loyal friend, a devoted sister, and a wonderful daughter.  We couldn't ask for anything more. 

Nine

Our beautiful, amazing baby girl is nine today.  I think that I say the same thing every year, but I just can't believe how quickly time flies.  Over the last year, Emily has grown in so many ways.  She has a fabulous sense of humor and an infectious belly laugh - when you hear her laughing, you just can't help but join in.  She is a great little athlete.  God has given her amazing athletic ability and when she is "on", there is no stopping her, there is no one better on the field.  She is strong, fast and smart - but at times, frustratingly lazy and unmotivated (something we hope that she will grow out of).  Much more important than her athletic ability, Emily has taken us by surprise in the classroom this year.  Although she's always been a good student, her teacher really encouraged her to bring things to a new level this year and she has really impressed us with how well she has done.  Her brain is like a sponge and she is eager to learn anything and everything.  Much of her spare time (including hours each week traveling to and from practices and games) is spent reading and she also likes to write stories.  She has a very deep love of Jesus and all things relating to the Church.  Emily took her First Holy Communion preparation very seriously; she loves reading her children's bible; and she is constantly pushing us to watch various biblical shows on television.  Her heart is huge and she is always looking to share hugs, kisses and snuggles.  Lee and I are truly blessed to be her parents and we can't wait to watch her grow over the next year.  Happy Ninth Birthday Emily!  We love you so much!!